For the Love of Blush, Cake & Romance

I’ve been having alot of girl get togethers these days and somehow the topic of conversation almost always ends up being about how to ensure “you’ve got your man” and how to “keep your marriage going strong”.  Because of the high divorce rate, I’ve been extremely interested to listen into viewpoints of what make marriages work.  More importantly, I like to listen to the older generation who are still happily married because they obviously know what it takes.

It’s starting to seem that only those who understand their place in the marriage are the ones who are making it. You listen to most of the people out there and the argument is all about “me” rather than “we” and ” I’m not being satisfied,” “this is so unfair to me,” etc…

But then you listen to those people who actually seem content in their marriage and they portray marriage as an acting of roles. Both men and women of these contented marriages agree that the man and the woman have traditional roles in a marriage and that’s what makes it work.  These roles are the following:

• The Man’s Role:  To lead and represent the family, Work – Bring home the money, Make all financial and important decisions, Protect his family.
• The Woman’s Role:  To care for her family and especially her husband, To be the perfect image of the family by keeping herself beautiful and the best that she can be, To handle the home and keep up social activities. 

Of course, there are a bunch more but the gist is the Man should be the Man and the Woman should be the Woman.  Things start to mess up when one side steps into the territory of the other. 

I still remember something I once heard from a very respected and successful man about his wife and why he’s happy in his marriage…  “All I expected from my wife when I married her was to remain the most beautiful she could be, care for our house, keep me comforted and relaxed by not letting me worry about house and tedious matters and to maintain our social activities and image and she hasn’t failed me which is why I love and respect her so much. ”   They don’t seem so madly in love but they respect each other so much.  He continues to be fascinated by her looks and beauty and is so proud to have her by his side and she depends on him for her security and well being.  It’s quite refreshing to see actually.

I don’t know, I haven’t figured out what I think the perfect formula to a marriage might be yet, but I’m leaning more towards the side of having “roles” in a marriage.

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