Guest Writer: Christina’s Take on Two Types of Men – Mr. Big & Aiden

April 15, 2008 at 3:47 pm | Posted in Girltalk, Guestwriters | 5 Comments
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Mr. Big

My good friend Christina sent me an article she had written on the subject of Mr. Big & Aiden.  She did a beautiful job of comparing the two and putting her personal experience into the Triangle of Love that Sex & the City is famous for. 

Thank you Christina. I loved it and it’s very true!  I hope you all enjoy this article as much as I did. 


Carrie should have chosen Aiden.

The wholesome, good-looking, “will strip your floors” for you while you shop kind of guy. He mumbles sweet moans while you kiss him, makes sure you always have coffee filters, and doesn’t really mind if you don’t like to walk his dog. He offered the kind of love most women long for but overlook:  depth and purity, flaws and quarks…in time and space she knows she wants him but for some reason always looks beyond his shoulder to try and find something a little less safe. When it comes to the age old argument of whether it should be Big or Aiden, there is no question in my mind which one is the better mate.

The way I see it, Aiden comes once in a lifetime, but we’ve all had our share of Big relationships. Big relationships often start out almost serendipitously. He has the smoothest voice and knows exactly what to say to intrigue you. He is successful in a way that even a Manhattan girl can appreciate, and although it may be hard to pinpoint his style of intimacy, you know despite his elusiveness outside, once inside the bedroom all logic and reason is fleeting.  It is so easy to see why she’s attracted to him, because before him no man equaled that level of raw intensity…still, her friends know how hard an addiction like this is to break; despite even months apart, her heart somehow will always be his.

The distinctions between the two kinds of relationships are as follows: in one hand are terms of substance, stability, and articulate romance. In the other, danger, intrigue, and seductive tragedy. Calculate every decision you have made and choose which end of the spectrum you’d like to reside; Carrie chose the latter.
For me, my Big exists somewhere in my fading past, childhood innocence but before adulthood realized. It was “…long ago, once upon a time…” when I felt like love was something reserved for luckier souls. Debonair hidden inside a shy persona, beaming from eyes his intensity matched by none, felt when his fingers played each instrument like a satin rhythm created as each day swept along. A quiet man of music, with so much to say but only so my ears could hear…when I entered his world and he into mine, no other souls existed. We danced that way for what seemed like many years… My Big was purely a lesson my heart sometimes still struggles to learn…

My Aiden is a true picture of happiness that without a doubt wouldn’t be cherished nearly as fully had I not first tasted love from the days of Big, when the addiction from Big was broken, I felt as if nothing could pull me out and away from the ghosts that haunt me. The man sent as rescue from the sinking abyss is a kind hearted smiling soul…crept in from out of the light, beckoning me onto calm waters, readying my sails to venture into new territory. When you are lost after a Big shipwreck, the only things that can save you are yourself, and anyone strong and willing enough to carry you out of the big mess. When I met my Aiden, I thought I had done a pretty damn good job salvaging what was left of my heart. I was wrong, thankfully though because he is the one who builds beauty from mismatched pieces, you just need to let him have the chance to work his craft. Because something inside me said to trust this man, now nothing is the same but I know what is to come each day, and I love every minute of it.

I am not directly related to Carrie, but in a lot of ways we share some character traits that make us pretty close cousins. Her reasons for ultimately choosing Big I have to admit I understand, I get it… for some women what is safe just doesn’t quite complete the image of what a good relationship should consist of. Some women need a few extra shots in their cosmopolitan, even if that makes the mix just a little bit off, the feeling once you’ve had that magic sip is exactly what makes the concoction worth it. I have tasted, I will never forget it, but I have to admit, I am a vintage wine girl…Aiden knows how to build me a wine cellar, and for me that perfection. Wondering what you did and the headache after too many shots is never worth the fun from the night before… a good wine rarely causes any pain or regrets and it is good to know with age it only gets better.




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  1. christina i loved the piece…i know where you are coming from for i am,like you,an aiden kind of girl

  2. Wow. I lovelovelove this piece. I’m a huge sex and city fan and also a complete mess when it comes to relationships. I’m trying to figure out if my man is a Big or Adien. I love the way you used your words and how you pieced it together. Youre truely brilliant.

  3. Really awesome article. Honest.

  4. Mandy, you’re a “Big” kind of girl, you can’t even spell!!!

  5. I really like your blog.. very nice colors & theme.
    Did you create this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you?
    Plz respond as I’m looking to create my own blog and would like to know where u got this from. appreciate it

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