From Cinderella to BridezillaMay 19, 2008 at 3:16 pm | Posted in Guestwriters, Love & Marriage | 9 Comments
Tags: Bride, Bridezilla, marriage, Stress, Wedding Day
Posted by Angel
Hello everyone, this is the first time I post something private online so forgive me for my lack of practice. I’ve enjoyed reading babycakes’ blog since its inauguration and I’ve immensely enjoyed both the articles and the feedback so I’ve decided to use this blog as my own kind of therapy during the stage I’m passing through now. You must have figured from the title by now that I am, in fact, a bride to be.
The day my fiancé proposed to me on a boat in the river that surrounds the city of Seville was without a doubt the happiest day of my life (so far at least) (I’ve always secretly dreamt of being proposed to on a boat, not quiet as big of a boat but rather a rowing boat…Bridget Jones / Old English Victorian era films effect )…and I was completely happy and relaxed during our two engagement parties…however I find myself not so relaxed right now with the wedding 3 months away. I find myself completely losing my calm. The symptoms began to show as soon as I came back from my trip back home to prepare for everything with my wedding planner, mother, sister and aunt. I was completely cool and composed. However, a couple of weeks after I got back I began to panic…and I’m not really sure why because everything is more or less taken care of and I’ve been good at following everything up…plus I cant wait to be married to my fiancé.. It’s just the wedding I’m flipping out about…I just keep wanting it to come out perfectly and for everyone to enjoy it (so whoever of you who are reading this and are going to honor us with your presence at the wedding you’d better tell me you had a good time, capish?)
Actually I’m lying…its not just the wedding I’m worried about…although I’m head over heels in love and not worried at all about my fiancé and our compatibility. He is truly my prince charming and I never thought I can be so happy, I find myself worrying about the future.. a year after the marriage we might have to move because of my work obligations and there are very big decisions that have to be taken very early on and that is scaring me. I’ve been moving around and away from home ever since I was 16 (12 years ago) and I just wish I can stop moving. Would the change change us?
I hate this habit of mine of thinking too far ahead and I try to stop myself from doing it but over and over again I find myself thinking and thinking and thinking. Is that what they call cold feet? Two weeks ago I took a week off and went away to visit one of my closest friends.. it was amazing being able to get away…I told her from the beginning I don’t want to even talk about the wedding. Being the oldest and first daughter and granddaughter to get married I had been a little overwhelmed with daily calls from my mum, sister, aunts, cousins, friends at whatever hour of the day to talk about it that I chose not to in that trip. You cannot believe how therapeutic that trip was for me.. I traveled around with my friend sometimes and we spoke about everything from politics (my vicious favorite subject),fashion, gossip and yes even guys, and sometimes I traveled alone and I was shocked at how much I enjoyed myself traveling alone…I thought ..I read (the kite runner.. an amazing book.. i couldn’t put it down until I finished it…it didn’t even bother me that i cried in public several times while reading it. Never have I enjoyed a book so much since teenage years.. highly recommendable…I went to the zoo and acted like a 5 year old kid. I didn’t check my email and hardly spoke on the phone, I was able to disconnect and enjoy being free.
However, the effect was temporary for with putting in the orders for the flower girl dresses and suit hunting with my fiancé I find myself starting to freak out again while my fiancé is super relaxed (actually he’s much more laid back than I am in general so maybe that’s it).
So my dear readers…I have decided to ask for your feedback.. for those of you who have gotten married or passed through something similar or very different, or those of you who have an opinion about this article that you’d like to share, or those of you who think I’m just plain weird and would like to give me a piece of your mind, please do…I need any help I can get and your opinions would be of great help ..
Thank you for listening and hope you all have a great day and life with stress free weddings…hehehe.